I would like to introduce you to...

So these are my animals. The one with the fluffy ears is Amber - she is the oldest at a year and 8 months. Silver is the other dachshund - he is a dapple at one year and 3 months, and last but not least the kitten. His name is Copper (yes there is a trend in the names. i wanted them to all get along) he is only 5 months old! Anyways - wanted to introduce you to them.

Work

A horrible place or a place to embrace your interests and use your strengths...Work. Right now I work in an environment that leaves me empty at the end of every day. It is temporary, but not so temporary that I can leave and never come back. It is that kind of permanent temporary-ness that provides income until something better comes along or your life takes a new direction. I have a month left - a month of staring into a computer screen, hurting my eyesight even more than it already is and pretending to work through the hours and hours of absolute boredom. Boredome is good when you are watching tv and sleeping. Boredom is not good for 8 hours out of the day when you must smile and look your best and you are getting paid for what you do, which in my case, A LOT of the time, is nothing. I am not saying I never have anything, because I do, but when I do it is a lot, and it comes in spurts. One minute it is here, the next minute is gone. The trouble is that once I begin on something I do it with efficiency and it doesn't take as long as I would like it to. So I have resorted to not doing stuff now so I can do it later, or only doing part of it now and finishing it another. It is incredible unsatisfying. I am just complaining/venting, so forgive me. However, the point of all this is that if you can do something in your job that you like, that you enjoy and that allows you to eat and live and all of those things, then DO IT!

Life Mottos

Enjoy life! Live it the fullest, Make every moment count! I don't know if anyone realizes it but that is near impossible, or at least extremmely hard to achieve. I look back at my day and I have wasted so much time. On hte other side of things, you can never live every minute to the fullest, perhaps it is just the moments that count that you must make sure you savor. Recently I have decided on a few things that I know make my life so much happier. I cannot have them right now, so where does that leave me? No where except in limbo, knowing what could be, but just NOT having it.

You have to give if you want to receive. Is that true? Is it a generally accepted notion? I would say so, at least from my sphere of perception. So what happens if you are always giving and barely ever receiving? it is probably okay to get fed up, tired and just resentful. Maybe the best people in the world would keep on giving without worrying about themselves, but not me! When it comes to people this is true for me. There is only so much you can deal with, that at some breaking point, it all falls to crap. Sure, it is easier to be lazy and let the other person do all the work, all the worrying, all the planning, all the effort, but COME ON! That leaves you no where, because as hard as it is to put in effort, it will actually leave you feeling better about yourself, because by putting in some effort you made the other person feel good as well. That should make it all worth it, but sure that isn't always the case, it depends on the people. Anyways - my point is that giving is good, but if you don't get anything back from the other person, giving is shit. It is about the same as laying yourself over a puddle so someone can walk on you to not get their feet wet. Giving and receiving go hand in hand, side by side. There is no I will walk in front of you or behind you, lagging. No way. The sad thing is that we don't live in an ideal world, and so shit happens, which means you have to try real hard not to give in to laziness and selfishness. Otherwise your life won't be what it can be. It won't be complete.

Unanswered phone calls

what's a phone for? really?

Parks, missing, pets, selfishness, work, boredom, ice cream

Tonight I went to the Blues on the Green out at Zilker Park. Tons of Austinites lounged out on the lawn listening to soulful beautiful voices with the sunset as a back drop...people had their dogs and it was just a great atmosphere. i missed my dogs - they didn't come. Eric, Beth and I brought a picnic so the dogs would not have been good but still you can still miss them. Speaking of missing, I miss Greg. I miss the blog. I should definitely write more. Shoulda Coulda Woulda... Anyways. It was lovely doing something tonight other than sitting at home reading or watching tv. Lindsay would love it here in Austin - the music, she would love the music. Lindsay if you read this, You should get a dog if you move here. We will be closer then, and maybe then I will actaully see you. I am sorry I never came to visit you. I should be ranked in the top 10 of horrible friends.

I think that I have a bad selfish streak. Is that allowed? When is it allowed if so? Sometimes I catch myself thinking of myself and wanting things to be convenient for me more than someone else.

Today at work I talked to my boss in her office for the first time in more than two months. she told me when my last day was at the job. unfortunately it was much earlier than I had hoped. i had hoped to stay and earn a little more money. the sad thing is when I was talking to her about certain items that Gretchen (who is taking over fully after I leave) will have to do, and I didn't feel like there was enough stuff. The past two months she has been :working" remotely maybe about two weeks total, so needless to say she hasn't been around much. I have been bored. certain times I have been busy, but bored most of the time. i hate being bored when there is nothing I can do - no tv, no book, etc. If for no other reason then to leave my boredom behind, i can't wait to get away from this job.

I learned recently they have ice cream for dogs. One is called Four Paws, however I discovered that it has cancer causing perservatives in it, so disappointing, but discouraging. There is one other type called Dogsters, and I tried to research it and could find a site that would let me search locations. Four Paws is in a grocery store 2 miles away from me. My doxies would love to have ice cream!